Starting our classes

Last night we paid our $120 and completed the first 2 hours (out of 10) of our required, online adoptive-parenting classes. There was some good advice we took away; like tips on cultivating an emotional bond and setting up a support network to handle unique international-adoption issues. We plan on assembling a "life book" for our child that holds all the pre-adoption facts, stories, and pictures that we can get our hands on and how the adoption process went. We want him/her to  feel clear about who they are, where they came from, and that we were/are committed to them. We're likely to get a child around the age of 18 months to 2 years, which allows for us to likely be all the child ever remembers as they grow into adulthood. But there are still unique issues for a child that may have been shuffled around, neglected, and/or abused in the begining. Even if the child doesn't have specific memories of their first year or two they can still have increased insecurity, fear, anger, and sadness stemming from their earliest interactions. I look at my 15 month old daughter and see how she has already bonded and grown so much due to her upbringing ...she could be much different than the girl we know now had she not been given stability and consistent love/care from us. So, we're trying our best to prepare for those potential issues and keeping in mind that God is able to fix the hurts that we cannot reach or even see. The same is true for our biological children.

Something that I wanted to make clear is this:
We do not look to this child (or our biological children) to fulfill us. We believe it is not a child's job to give his/her parents purpose, significance, or even unconditional love. We are pursuing adoption because it's right. Because we feel "called". And because every child deserves love, commitment, and stability, whether they have anything to give in return or not. We will love this child because we choose to. Because God chose and "adopted" us. We don't need another reason because that's more than enough.

Please keep us and our future child in your prayers. There's still a long road ahead and undoubtedly many obstacles. I find myself getting increasingly more emotional at the thought of waiting and neglected children and can easily fall into frustration at the general lack of urgency the world seems to have about the topic. BUT I don't ever want to become embittered or angry. The truth is that we're blessed that God is allowing us to "tag along" on what He's doing here and I want to remember that truth through every twist and turn. Being able to share our love because God first loved us (even when we didnt love Him back) is priceless and amazing (1 John 4:19).